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First Weeks

There may be 50 ways to leave, but only a handful to make it legal

There are so many options out there for people who need to divorce – mediation, collaborative law, arbitration, litigation. Which process is right for you? Alyssa Rower of Aronson, Mayefsky and Sloan, and Ani Mason of Mason Law and Mediation have teamed up to break...

Who should be on my “divorce team”?

I’ve hired my divorce attorney. Who else, if anyone, should be on my “divorce team”? Many divorces will go from start to finish with only divorce attorneys involved. Other cases benefit from the expertise of other professionals. From our perspective, there’s no right...

The Purge Splurge: Getting Rid of his Stuff

We all know the old caveat about home renovations and marriage, but I am the only woman I know whose husband moved out the very same month we moved into our newly fixed -up place! In some ways, this made things easier (for ways in which it didn’t, see HANDYMAN)....

Get a Grip on Your Finances

Need a road map to getting your finances in order? Our experts Ani Mason and Alyssa Rower discuss what you need to know as you head into divorce. Budgeting Typical questions that may arise in a divorce process include: What did I spend during my marriage? What will my...

Can You Buy a Divorce for the Cost of a New Vacuum Cleaner? The Down and Dirty Divorce

I learned for certain that our marriage was on its way to extinction when I came across a memo to my husband referring to his recent contract with one of New York City’s most infamous divorce attorneys. After picking myself up off the floor, I figured I had no choice...

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Coping

Don’t Twist My Lug Nuts (or How to Really Change A Tire)

Tire tricks for solo travelers Summer is here, and for those of us traveling the highways as women alone, or alone with kids, its good to be prepared for the unexpected. Since my husband moved out, I've had three flat tires, er, make that three opportunities to learn...

Getting Through It: A Story About Fashion

Sometimes, the oddest things can get you through The first weeks after our decision to separate, I walked around in a stunned, anxious limbo. I moved through the necessary parts of each day-getting kids to school, buying groceries, visiting the doctor, the lawyer,...

The Hard Work of Getting Back to Work

One of the low points during those first post -split weeks came on a Friday afternoon when my twelve year-old came home from school with his pals. He announced that they would be staying out as late as they wanted that night. When I said no, he puffed himself up,...

A Second Look at the Vicious Cycle of Divorce

I am one of those children of divorce who grew up only to get divorced myself. It is the typical sad story. But then why am I so happy? My parents divorced when I was five. I don’t recall much, other than a hazy impression of my mother arguing with my father while...

Clear Your Shed, Clear Your Head: 5 Steps to Reclaiming your Space

Start by setting a deadline. Need a push? Commit to host something: a clothing swap, a school function, a book group, a family reunion or a mom's night. Set the date far enough in the future so you have the time you need to get the job done. Call in some help: If a...

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Parenting

When Your Co-Parent Suffers From Mental Illness or Addiction (Video)

Video shorts feature excerpts from our UNtied panel events. In this short: how to co-parent when your ex suffers from addiction how to co-parent when you ex suffers from mental illness how to co-parent with an uncooperative ex-spouse co-parenting when your ex has...

Talking to your Kids: 6 Pointers

The following comes from Jean Kunhardt M.A, LMHC and Lisa Spiegel M.A., LMHC, the directors of Soho Parenting, an invaluable resource for families in Lower Manhattan: Simple and Honest: Telling Your Children About Separation Telling your children that you are...

How to Co-Parent After Your Divorce (Video)

Video shorts feature excerpts from our UNtied panel events. In this short: how to co-parent with your ex how to develop a parenting plan how to create clear rules for both parents tips for reducing conflict with your ex around co-parenting Speakers: Jessica Rothberg,...

Don’t Be The Toxic Parent This Season

Do You find yourself doing any of the following? Make your children choose between you and your ex? Argue with the other parent in front of your child? Use your child as a messenger or mediator? Speak badly about the other parent to a relative, friend or...

Co-Parenting- Get it In Writing!

Divorce is it’s own difficult but necessary ordeal to go through when a marriage no longer works. Add kids to the mix and there is a whole other layer of decisions to go through. While divorce is final, parenting is an ever-changing landscape that ties you to your ex...

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New Love

Got Questions on Post-Marital Dating? Ask Ursula Knot!

Dear Ursula, My new boyfriend and I get along fine, I guess, but our pheromones don't. I like his body, I just don't like his smell. I especially don't like the way it kind of sticks to me after we've spent the night together. What's the deal with pheromones anyway?...

We Asked the Founders of a new Dating Website for the Inside Scoop:

Unlike most online dating website and apps, Coffee Meets Bagel was founded by women. They are three sisters, in fact, who set out to create a more female friendly website that advertises quality not quantity. CMB offers only one, carefully vetted match proposition...

Excellent Excerpt: What Is Love? Love Is An Action

Excerpt from Susan J. Elliott's Getting Past Your Breakup When I’ve asked my clients, seminar students, and my blog readers what is the single most helpful thing I’ve said to them, “Love is an action” is in the top three on most lists. It’s what you do, not what you...

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Thank you for creating a safe space for women in the different stages of divorce to share, support, and learn from each other. For many of us, there is no community to turn to for support. Of course, our friends and loved ones reach out to comfort us, but connecting with others going through similar experiences is invaluable.

Rochelle

I got my lawyer through UNtied! I was totally clueless about collaborative divorce before going to one of your panels. UNtied saved me a lot of time, pain and money. Eternally grateful!

Nancy

At a moment when I was in complete shock, stunned and had absolutely no idea how to proceed, it was enormously comforting and helpful to have a group of brilliant women to turn to, each of whom had suggestions, and stories. Knowing you are not alone is big!

Liz