Articles

First Weeks

Who should be on my “divorce team”?

I’ve hired my divorce attorney. Who else, if anyone, should be on my “divorce team”? Many divorces will go from start to finish with only divorce attorneys involved. Other cases benefit from the expertise of other professionals. From our perspective, there’s no right...

How to Find a Divorce Attorney

There is no shortage of good lawyers in this town. Super Lawyers, a service that rates attorneys by recommendation of their peers, currently lists 168 outstanding matrimonial lawyers in New York City. The question is which is the best lawyer for you. Check out the...

Filing for Divorce

Alyssa Ann Rower Family Law Attorney, Rower LLC alyssa.rower@gmail.com Q:  What EXACTLY does it mean to “file for divorce” and when should I be doing this? A:  While there isn’t just one way to proceed in a divorce case and your particular path will depend on your...

Get a Grip on Your Finances

Need a road map to getting your finances in order? Our experts Ani Mason and Alyssa Rower discuss what you need to know as you head into divorce. Budgeting Typical questions that may arise in a divorce process include: What did I spend during my marriage? What will my...

We Asked, You Answered: What was the Best Advice you were Given during your Breakup?

The world feels like it is falling out from under you, but you will be ok, and probably happier than you have been in the last 12 years.  "Let yourself feel everything."  “Get a good lawyer and let them do their job!”  "Get all the support you can find including...

Coping

What Went Wrong? A story about plants. Mostly.

I gave them everything; the richest compost, careful misting twice a day, scrupulous weeding, and heaps of praise.   Situated as they were, outside the door where my son plays the piano,  they were even given regular serenades.   At first, the tiny, stumpy plugs of...

Don’t Twist My Lug Nuts (or How to Really Change A Tire)

Tire tricks for solo travelers Summer is here, and for those of us traveling the highways as women alone, or alone with kids, its good to be prepared for the unexpected. Since my husband moved out, I've had three flat tires, er, make that three opportunities to learn...

The Hard Work of Getting Back to Work

One of the low points during those first post -split weeks came on a Friday afternoon when my twelve year-old came home from school with his pals. He announced that they would be staying out as late as they wanted that night.  When I said no, he puffed himself up,...

Coping with Wedding Season

If you’re in the midst of a divorce or newly single, a wedding might be the last event you want to attend, but there are ways to survive weddings, and even enjoy them. As a recent guest on Mandy Walker's podcast Since My Divorce, we talked about how to navigate...

Divorce and the Family Car

Starting this week, I’m in hiding from Audi financial services. They’re coming after me, I know, because I’m on the lam with their property; their 2010 Audi A6  wagon to be precise. I was supposed to turn it in two months ago. I would never do this to Avis or Hertz,...

Parenting

Don’t Be The Toxic Parent This Season

Do You  find yourself doing any of the following? Make your children choose between you and your ex? Argue with the other parent in front of your child? Use your child as a messenger or mediator? Speak badly about the other parent to a relative, friend or...

Co-Parenting- Get it In Writing!

Divorce is it’s own difficult but necessary ordeal to go through when a marriage no longer works. Add kids to the mix and there is a whole other layer of decisions to go through. While divorce is final, parenting is an ever-changing landscape that ties you to your ex...

How to Co-Parent After Your Divorce (Video)

Video shorts feature excerpts from our UNtied panel events. In this short: how to co-parent with your ex how to develop a parenting plan how to create clear rules for both parents tips for reducing conflict with your ex around co-parenting Speakers: Jessica Rothberg,...

When Your Co-Parent Suffers From Mental Illness or Addiction (Video)

Video shorts feature excerpts from our UNtied panel events. In this short: how to co-parent when your ex suffers from addiction how to co-parent when you ex suffers from mental illness how to co-parent with an uncooperative ex-spouse co-parenting when your ex has...

Talking to your Kids: 6 Pointers

The following comes from Jean Kunhardt M.A, LMHC and Lisa Spiegel M.A., LMHC, the directors of  Soho Parenting, an invaluable resource for families in Lower Manhattan: Simple and Honest: Telling Your Children About Separation Telling your children that you are...

New Love

Got Questions on Post-Marital Dating? Ask Ursula Knot!

Dear Ursula, My new boyfriend and I get along fine, I guess, but our pheromones don't. I like his body, I just don't like his smell. I especially don't like the way it kind of sticks to me after we've spent the night together. What's the deal with pheromones anyway?...

We Asked the Founders of a new Dating Website for the Inside Scoop:

Unlike most online dating website and apps, Coffee Meets Bagel was founded by women.  They are  three sisters, in fact, who set out to create a more female friendly website that advertises quality not quantity.  CMB offers only one, carefully vetted match proposition...

Excellent Excerpt: What Is Love? Love Is An Action

Excerpt from Susan J. Elliott's Getting Past Your Breakup When I’ve asked my clients, seminar students, and my blog readers what is the single most helpful thing I’ve said to them, “Love is an action” is in the top three on most lists.  It’s what you do, not what you...

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Thank you for creating a safe space for women in the different stages of divorce to share, support, and learn from each other. For many of us, there is no community to turn to for support. Of course, our friends and loved ones reach out to comfort us, but connecting with others going through similar experiences is invaluable.

Rochelle

I got my lawyer through UNtied! I was totally clueless about collaborative divorce before going to one of your panels. UNtied saved me a lot of time, pain and money. Eternally grateful!
Nancy

At a moment when I was in complete shock, stunned and had absolutely no idea how to proceed, it was enormously comforting and helpful to have a group of brilliant women to turn to, each of whom had suggestions, and stories. Knowing you are not alone is big!
Liz